I’m over at Addicted 2 Heroines today discussing Noon’s missing tooth. What?! you ask. Yep, I answer. She loses a tooth in this book. It’s no huge spoiler. It happens in Chapter 1. Want to read about why I knocked her tooth out? Check out the post here.

Today’s guest blogger is Auralee Wallace, author of Sidekick, her debut superhero novel that was just released two days ago. She’s here to debate superheroes, give you a chance to win an ecopy of her new release, and share a Sidekick-inspired Polyvore set. Never heard of Polyvore? Yeah, me neither until I loaded up this post — but what a fun concept. Once registered, users can create themed collections. Looks like an online shopper’s version of Pinterest…? Wikipedia calls it a “community powered social commerce website.” Just today, Fast Company hosted Polyvore’s VP of Engineering who discussed scrappy startups and scaling up. Polyvore was a fun time suck for me as I contemplated creating a Noon Onyx themed collection… But. Then. Realized. Must… Stay… Focused! So, without further hullabaloo: Welcome, Auralee!

Sidekick

Who Would You Rather…?

(If you don’t know what word goes at the end of this question, this post may not for you…hint: it’s not “be”)

An Exploration of Alpha vs Beta Heroes and Some Pretty Tasteless Fun

by Auralee Wallace

Seeing as I write about superheroes – my debut novel, Sidekick is out June 1st – and read a lot of romance, I often have random thoughts about both topics, and this post was born out of those musings. Now before we proceed, I should warn this is not a very mature post, it absolutely objectifies men, and I will deny I ever wrote it if pressed. Got it? Good. Let’s proceed.

 Bruce Banner or The Hulk?

Photograph resized and cropped. Photographer: Slackerwood http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.5/
Photograph resized and cropped. Photographer: Slackerwood http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.5/
Photograph resized. Photographer: kiwanja http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.5/
Photograph resized. Photographer: kiwanja http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.5/

I know. It’s kind of a crazy place to start. This one is a tough one. One the one hand, what does it say about me if I choose the bipolar, green monster? I mean, sure, The Hulk is a puppy dog with women and children, and my guess is that he might be very big, well, all-over, but he does have some serious rage issues, and he’s not the brightest of the green bulbs. On the other hand, I’m not particularly romanced by Bruce Banner either. I’m a child of the 70s/80s, so my Bruce Banner is Bill Bixby (I can’t find a free stock photo of him and Hulk knows I’m not going to buy one, so you’ll have to Google him if you don’t know who I’m talking about). I gotta say Bill Bixby is about as attractive to me as Edward Norton is…and that’s not very much. So I’m going to have to go with neither.

That’s cheating, you say? My post. My rules.

 Clark Kent or Superman?

Photograph resized. Photographer: Xurble http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.5/
Photograph resized. Photographer: Xurble http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.5/

Uh oh, I may be in trouble again here.

I just can’t imagine choosing either Clark Kent or Superman. I mean even in Superman form, I can’t help but think the Man of Steel might just be  a little too vanilla for me. You know what I’m saying? It’s not that I need a Christian Grey in the bedroom, at least not all the time, but I suspect Superman would be really, really polite in bed…like polite to the point of frustration. So, once again, I’m going to say neither.

But never fear!

There is a third choice.

A third choice? Not fair you say? Once again against the rules? Did I mention it’s my post? Besides I think you’ll agree there really only is one choice to be made. Henry Cavill. No character necessary. Just Henry Cavill would be fine.

Resized photo. Photographer: david_shankbo http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.5/
Resized photo. Photographer: david_shankbo http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.5/

Or maybe I could go looking for the chest model in the picture above. Just kidding. I like my men to have heads. I’m weird like that.

 Bruce Wayne or Batman?

Christian Bale Photograph cropped/resized. Photographer: Alternatewords http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.5/
Christian Bale Photograph cropped/resized. Photographer: Alternatewords http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.5/
Batman photograph cropped. Photographer: PopCultureGeek.com http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.5/
Batman photograph cropped. Photographer: PopCultureGeek.com http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.5/

Yes, please…I mean, either or is fine with me…both maybe. I’m not sure how that would work…someone should get Maya Banks on this.

Peter Parker or Spiderman?

Tobey Maguire resized photo. Photographer: Tostie14 http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.5/
Tobey Maguire resized photo. Photographer: Tostie14 http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.5/
Spiderman image: public domain
Spiderman image: public domain

I’ll admit I’m having have trouble with this one too. Spiderman has never appealed to me in any of his forms. He’s always just seemed kind of effeminate to me, and in the movies, he’s always played by baby actors. My reaction to most Spiderman actors/depictions is much the same as my reaction to this photo:

Photograph resized. Photographer: chimothy27Tostie14 http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.5/
Photograph resized. Photographer: chimothy27 http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.5/

Aww. Isn’t he adorable? He’s tuckered out from all his crime-fighting.

 Tony Stark or Iron Man?

Tony Stark photograph resized. Photographer: mr.skeleton http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.5/
Tony Stark photograph resized. Photographer: mr.skeleton http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.5/
Iron Man photograph resized and cropped. Photographer: woolennium http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.5/
Iron Man photograph resized and cropped. Photographer: woolennium http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.5/

This one is easy. There is no contest. If you don’t say Tony Stark, there is something wrong with you. This conversation is over.

Well, I hope you have enjoyed this edition of Who Would You Rather? I know I have. So until next time, I wish you all sweet dreams. Mine will be about Tony.

More About Sidekick

Heroes meets Kick-Ass in this brilliant and hilarious debut about a girl who just wants to save the world…

Bremy St James, daughter of billionaire Atticus St James, has been cut off from the family fortune and is struggling to survive in a world that no longer holds its breath every time she buys a new outfit. To make matters worse, her twin sister is keeping secrets, loan sharks are circling, and the man of her dreams — a newspaper reporter — is on assignment to bring down everyone with the last name St James.

Things are certainly looking bleak for the down-and-out socialite until a good deed throws her into the path of the city’s top crime-fighter, Dark Ryder. Suddenly, Bremy has a new goal: apprentice to a superhero, and start her own crime-fighting career.

Ryder has no need for a sidekick, but it turns out the city needs Bremy’s help. Atticus St James is planning the crime of the century, and Bremy may be the only one able to get close enough to her father to stop him.

Now all she needs to do is figure out this superhero thing in less than a month, keep her identity secret from the man who could very well be The One, and save the city from total annihilation.

Well, no one ever said being a superhero would be easy…

Auralee Wallace
Auralee Wallace

More About Auralee

Auralee Wallace has played many roles in her life, including college professor, balloon seller, and collections agent. She is now living her dream of writing humorous women’s fiction. When this semi-natural blonde mother of three children (and psychiatric nurse to two rescue cats) isn’t writing or playing soccer, she can be found watching soap operas with lurid fascination and warring with a family of peregrine falcons for the rights to her backyard.

The Giveaway and the Sidekick-Inspired Polyvore Set

Auralee is giving away 5 ecopies of Sidekick at the end of her blog tour. Click here for the Rafflecopter form to enter to win.

And click here to check out all the neat stuff in her online Sidekick shopping collection.

Sidekick Banner

So… thoughts on Auralee’s post?

I’ll weigh in here with an even bigger disclaimer than Auralee’s in her opening paragraph and then admit that I love Tony Stark too. Why? Because Robert Downey, Jr. does a damn fine job playing him. I also really like Andrew Garfield as Spider-Man. Even though he’s young, I think him and Emma Stone have great chemistry and are really cute together. (I haven’t seen Spidey 2. Have you? Whadya think?)

And I must defend Edward Norton! I loved his performances in The Illusionist and The Painted Veil. Who saw?

And Polyvore? Is anyone on there? Have you tried it? Let us know in the comments. Thank you, Auralee, for guest blogging today!

p.s. after we discuss superheroes, let’s discuss über heroines. Don’t forget to head over to Addicted 2 Heroines where I ask:

If you could choose only one word to describe your ideal heroine, would it be interesting, relatable, or admirable?

Do you like heroines who are drop dead gorgeous without a single physical flaw?

Or do you like heroines with scars, wounds, and/or other evidence of being put through the story wringer by their diabolical creators?

Thanks, everyone! Hope to see you there!